Dark days and even darker nights can add to low moods. There is often a deep urge, to keep overly busy but many of us lack the energy or motivation to do so. Then the guilt of not been able to perform as well as we think we should kicks in. Adding to the never ending cycle of reasons we have to whop ourselves, with that good old wooden spoon.
Truth is, I for one can fully relate, having manifested Fibromyalgia in this life time, the past 8 weeks have been pretty hell. I tend to ignore it most of the time, this Fibromylagia thing but sometimes it kicks in so hard you just cant get away with giving it the silent treatment. So I embrace the lesson and the quiet time it demands. I am constantly tired, sore and just want to sleep like a bear. I struggle to get up in the mornings from the lack of daylight and every part of me would vanish tomorrow to somewhere warm just to feel alive again. I often withdraw and talk less in these times, so as to conserve what little energy I have. I tell myself almost daily that I am not this life, I am not this condition etc etc but what if this condition is forcing me to make a life decision that is part of a path I cannot fully see yet? I have watched my body patterns for the best part of 8 or more years now and each year without fail, I quickly decline in energy levels in the winter month, making it pretty difficult to plan a life, never mind a career. I have come to the conclusion that I am Dawn by name and Dawn by nature. Put simply, I need the sun to enjoy my life to the max. My name represents the one thing I crave and my soul needs. Light! And tons of it! So I made a choice to stop procrastinating and put in a two year escape plan finally and who ever is with me the day I depart for my new life in permanent sun...well Happy Days. For now I await in the ashes until I am ready to rise like the Phoenix once more. All I can do right now is listen to my need to sleep and pray the Universe keeps a roof over my head, as my business and an income, once more gets a back seat.
On a positive note its given me time to think about my career and my long time interest in crime. I am addicted to Major Crimes at present and working my way through my first Forensic Psychology book with the view to move on to study Criminal Psychology, Forensics and Profiling.
I have also been experiencing a number of power animals coming in around me this month such as the white owl and the phoenix. The phoenix came in a sequence of threes and so I took heed and went exploring in my waking moments, the significance it has for both myself and the month of January for many of us, in general.
The Phoenix is a large bird having many connections to different cultures in the world, such as Egypt, Greece & Rome. It lived for 1000 years and can be seen as a story of hope and resurrection. Its history is steep and its said to be made up of a orange and fiery red colors. It is connected to the rising sun and fire. So with my deep urges to run to a dessert and plonk my head in the hot sand, its no surprise the Phoenix has shown up in my life at this time. (Grateful) Its desire to build a nest and prepare itself for its physical end, is pretty interesting. Once it claps it wings, it ignite into flames and rises again from the ashes. This can be seen as re-birthing process, a hibernation period perhaps, a time for rest. (Sound familiar?)
So If you have been feeling pretty similar to me then this Mystical Bird is for you...
The presence of the Phoenix in your life can indicate a rise or ascension to power or finding your rightful place in this world. It also symbolizes immortality and the eternal journey of the soul. When the Phoenix shows up in your life, old parts of you may be dying and in ways it can feel like your grieving. This can be daunting when its presented, hence why the Phoenix reminds us this moment of great change wont last, in fact your in the process of discovering a whole new part of your life. As all these old parts are moving away, new aspects of your life will begin to emerge and as you gather your strength to meet your new life your inner spirit will rise once more. It may also feel like a life review as you see old parts of your life, perhaps conversations you had with people, events etc flash through your mind.
Its vital you take care of yourself in these times of processing...here are some things I like to do to boost me
You have everything you need within you and around you to move through this time.
Meditate on the energy of the Phoenix to draw in its powerful strength and the reserves you need to Rise Again.
If you experience the Winter Blues, SAD Syndrome or Fibromyalgia etc and would like to share your thoughts please do so. May you be Blessed and Inspired by the Angels in your life today and in this moment.
The Story Of The Phoenix
There is a bird that lays no eggs and has no young. It was here when the world began and is still living today, in a hidden, faraway desert spot. It is the phoenix, the bird of fire.
One day in the beginning times, the sun looked down and saw a large bird with shimmering feathers. They were red and gold--bright and dazzling like the sun itself. The sun called out, "Glorious Phoenix, you shall be my bird and live forever!"
Live forever! The Phoenix was overjoyed to hear these words. It lifted its head and sang, "Sun glorious sun, I shall sing my songs for you alone!"
But the Phoenix was not happy for long. Poor bird. Its feathers were far too beautiful. Men, women, and children were always casing it and trying to trap it. They wanted to have some of those beautiful, shiny feathers for themselves.
"I cannot live here," thought the phoenix and it flew off toward the east, where the sun rises in the morning.
The Phoenix flew for a long time, and then came to a far away, hidden desert where no humans lived. And there the phoenix remained in peace, flying freely and singing its songs of praise to the sun above.
Almost five hundred years passed. The Phoenix was still alive, but it had grown old. It was often tired, and it had lost much of its strength. It couldn't soar so high in the sky, nor fly as fast or as far as it was young.
"I don't want to live like this," thought the Phoenix. "I want to be young and strong."
So the Phoenix lifted it's head and sang, "Sun, glorious sun, make me young and strong again!" but the sun didn't answer. Day after day the Phoenix sang. When the sun still didn't answer, the Phoenix decided to return to the place where it had lived in the beginning and ask the sun one more time.
It flew across the desert, over hills, green valleys, and high mountains. The journey was long, and because the Phoenix was old and weak, it had to rest along the way. Now, the Phoenix has a keen sense of smell and is particularly fond of herbs and spices. So each time it landed, it collected pieces of cinnamon bark and all kinds of fragrant leaves. It tucked some in among its feathers and carried the rest in its claws.
When at last the bird came to the place that had once been its home, it landed on a tall palm tree growing high on a mountainside. Right at the top of the tree, the Phoenix built a nest with the cinnamon bark and lined it with the fragrant leaves. Then the Phoenix flew off and collected some sharp-scented gum called myrrh, which it had seen oozing out of a nearby tree. The Phoenix made an egg from the myrrh and carried the egg back to the nest.
Now everything was ready. The Phoenix sat down in its nest, lifted its head, and sang, "Sun, glorius sun, make me young and strong again!"
This time the sun heard the song. Swiftly it chased the clouds from the sky and stilled the winds and shone down on the mountainside with all its power.
The animals, the snakes, the lizards, and every other bird hid from the sun's fierce rays -- in caves and holes, under shady rocks and trees. Only the Phoenix sat upon its nest and let the suns rays beat down upon it beautiful, shiny feathers.
Suddenly there was a flash of light, flames leaped out of the nest, and the Phoenix became a big round blaze of fire.
After a while the flames died down. The tree was not burnt, nor was the nest. But the Phoenix was gone. In the nest was a heap of silvery-gray ash.
The ash began to tremble and slowly heave itself upward. From under the ash there rose up a young Phoenix. It was small and looked sort of crumpled, but it stretched its neck and lifted its wings and flapped them. Moment by moment it grew, until it was the same size as the old Phoenix. It looked around, found the egg made of myrrh, and hollowed it out. Then it placed the ashes inside and finally closed up the egg. The young Phoenix lifted its head and sang, "Sun, glorious sun, I shall sing my songs for you alone! Forever and ever!"
When the song ended, the wind began to blow, the clouds came scudding across the sky, and the other living creatures crept out of their hiding places.
Then the Phoenix, with the egg in its claws, flew up and away. At the same time, a cloud of birds of all shapes and sizes rose up from the earth and flew behind the Phoenix, singing together, "You are the greatest of birds! You are our king!"
The birds flew with the Phoenix to the temple of the sun that the Egyptians had built at Heliopolis, city of the sun. Then the Phoenix placed the egg with the ashes inside on the sun's altar.
"Now," said the Phoenix, "I must fly on alone." And while the other birds watched, it flew off toward the faraway desert.
The Phoenix lives there still. But every five hundred years, when it begins to feel weak and old, it flies west to the same mountain. There it builds a fragrant nest on top of a palm tree, and there the sun once again burns it to ashes. But each time, the Phoenix rises up from those ashes, fresh and new and young again.
Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.